WTF. WHAT. THE. FLU.

30 Sep

I promise. I was going to sit down and write a deeply meaningful post tonight about handcuffs and high chairs, but that will have to come some other time. Tonight was nothing short of exhausting as Nolanasaurus Rex allowed only headaches, tears, and frustration. Not all of those emotions were experienced by baby alone.

You see, Nolan aka Nolanator aka Noles aka Nolesy Butt got his 6-month flu shot today. Now I want to back way up to like a year ago, to when Josie and I first had the immunization talk. It is one of many talks that expecting parents have to have, an important decision that has to be made and agreed upon. I have always had an uneasy feeling with immunization; with the thought of introducing your pure child to something so menacing and so did the Mrs. But she had a good point: Do you want your kid to be the one not protected from a sudden outbreak of Polio? Didn’t think so. So right, wrong, or whatever — we decided to be safe and protect Nolan from these chronic illnesses. Every parent may not agree with that philosophy and that’s ok. That’s why he’s my kid and not yours, ya know?

So Nolan got his flu shot today and was a total stud about it. From his account of the story the nurse came in and was totally making moves on him. She even asked him to pull his pants down — how inappropriate! — so that she could rub his thigh!? I then learned from Josie that the nurse actually just needed a better angle for the needle, and the rubbing was just alcohol to disinfect the area. Babies… you just can’t believe a thing they say. In either case he didn’t even cry during the shot. That is phenomenal for a Dill boy. I mean, I cry when Mrs Pickle even mentions I might need a flu shot. My son didn’t cry before, during, or after the shot. In fact, he laughed at the nurse. Typical flirt. He is basically more of a man than I am. As a side note — how do you tell a baby how utterly proud you are of them and get them to understand??

Tonight though we cried. By we I really just mean Nolan. Nolan cried. I mean he crieeeeeedddddd. I mean, seriously. WTF. Tears and tears and screams and cries and what seemed like heart breaking agony for hours on end. He could not be consoled, he didn’t want to be held, he didn’t want his pacifier, he just wanted to be pissed. And truly that wouldn’t have been a problem if scream crying wasn’t bellowed at about a 110 db level. I’ll cover my obligatory bases here and let everyone know that yes, he is still eating. No, he isn’t running a fever. Yes, he did get a little bit of tylenol to ease the pain. No, he isn’t still up thank the Lord. Yes, we felt completely helpless at times. But now covered in legit puke (not the sufferable spit-up, we’re talkin’ half digested carrots here) and barely maintaining basic functions, the Pickles are throwing in the towel. Meaningful posts can wait. Because as any parent will tell you: when the monster is sleeping isn’t time to be catching up on re-run episodes of Breaking Bad. No, it might just be the only chance you get to catch some sleep of your own…

Simply put these are the reasons I didn’t get to watch the Dolphins-Saints game tonight, or just caught the last inning of the Rangers-Rays play-in game, or don’t even know if the US government is still functioning (hope not). Feel sorry for me? I don’t. I say this all the time, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

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Helping Dad with some blogs….

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One Response to “WTF. WHAT. THE. FLU.”

  1. Karla R Richmond October 1, 2013 at 1:57 pm #

    I have given more immunizations to more babies and children than I care to remember. I am enjoying title work for trailer purchases as my last job. No crying babies, sleepless parents—stressed because they don’ know how to console their babies and children. My admiration for you both as new parents is off the charts. I can only say it gets better….

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